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(no subject)


All of my entries are friends only. I don't mind if you add me, just let me know you are doing so or I will have absolutely no idea, making it impossible for me to add you back.

There is a 98.9% chance I will add you, as long as you aren't ridiculous :'].

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(no subject)

It's friday. who wants to take me to dinner followed by laughs and acting like a moron? slight snuggling may be required.
dream boy, where the fuck are you when I need you?
  • Current Music
    Face to Face - I Want
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YOU'RE LIKE A KNIFE IN MY HEAD.

I'm so sick of the 'OMG I'M PUNK ROCK BECAUSE I WEAR POLKA DOTTED HEADBANDS AND CAMO SHIRTS' sluts. you have nothing with depth to say, and you spend half of your lifetime in front of the fucking mirror trying to tease your hair up as big as you can. you listen to the locust and modest mouse, and you're down b'rah! do you listen to them? or does it make you look so keeewl to say that you like them? no amount of blue or green eye shadow, and generic clothing take away the grossness that is your face. fuck you bitches. you're ugly and you're fucking annoying as shit.
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(no subject)

I need a haircut.
I need a new job.
I need the 3's company box set.
I need a boy.
I need happy thoughts.
I need new surroundings.
I need truth.
I need confidence.
I need socks.
I need giggles.
I need a father.
I need sleep.

bye.
  • Current Music
    I used to be your inspiration.
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I hate how this reminds me of you in the worst way.

one look of discontent fills your hazel eyes as I ask for the millionth time what's going on, you seem to be confused about just where you stand with me tonight as we tear apart all that wasn't lost to another fight. and so we turn against eachother once again, you run and I go hide, talking to myself again bout all the things I shoulda said and I wait for you, I sit and wait for you. I wanna know where this is going and do we still have a chance to save what we haven't lost again. I made a promise to myself not to let this go, but now I need to see this through to burn all these paper walls of doubt. my fucked up head is spinning round and all my thoughts just keep me down, here on your door step i'm drunk again. I know you're sick of all my shit and I know you wanna end all this, so tell me right now where do you stand? and I know you're tired of this waiting game and i know you're tired of all my ways, i know you're tired of it all. just tell me now I wanna know where this is going and do we, still have a chance to save what we haven't lost inside all these paper walls we build and all the ahses that have spilled get in the way. and so we turn against eachother once again you run and I go hide, talking to myself again bout all the things I shoulda said and I wait for you..I still wait for you.
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ENOUGH.!

Stop saying you're sorry already. And stop doing things that cause you to say you're sorry.
please. because my head is going to explode.
  • Current Mood
    aggravated aggravated
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(no subject)

I feel like I don't deserve to be loved. and I feel like a basket case. I hate to cry. I do it when I let everything build up until I can't take it anymore. I know i'm not easy to love, but can't you try? i'm so tired of letting you bring me down, and not being able to trust anyone. and I thought that I didn't care, but I do. I do fucking care. why don't you? I want you to.
i'm not perfect, but in all my inperfections there is beauty, somewhere.
  • Current Mood
    numb numb
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walking down the streeet and I hardly know you.

It's been over 7 months since i've seen you or spoken to you. 7 months since I decided to get all of my stuff and come back home. That was probably the hardest fucking thing that i've ever had to do in my life. Knowing someone and loving someone for 3 years, then one day realizing that it's just not the same, and erasing that person from your life, is impossible. I remember everything. I remember the smell in the air in november, how crisp and cold it was. I remember waking you up at 3 a.m. because I couldn't sleep, and you getting dressed so we could walk to the park across the street from your house instead. I even remember when you would scribble my name on walls or those big electrical boxes with a permanent marker. How are you just supposed to forget things like this? I tried, and I want to forget most of it. because I think that would be a lot easier. when I opened up my dusty shoe box and found your pictures, it felt like my heart dropped and fell out of my chest. Because who you were in those photos is gone, you're someone new now. I should be too. The biggest step in life is letting go. The easiest thing about this is that you're far away, and i'll never see you again. I hope that wherever you are now is where you want to be. and that you keep yourself alive long enough to enjoy what it's like to be an adult.
I used to be the one who held everyone together. I can't even hold myself together.
  • Current Mood
    crushed crushed